The Lesson of Love :Part 2

Hi everyone 😊,

With Christmas around the corner .....I have nothing but joy,joy,joy down  in my heart. Maybe it has something to do with the warm temperatures we've been having...I'm still wondering if I will get to see a white Christmas this year at all.😕
     On to the topic at hand ....Where do I start? I remember  when I had my very first crush....I was in grade school/elementary/primary school and I remember  his face  to this day....I had no clue what it meant just that whenever I saw him I wanted him to notice me.Lol Now fast forward 20 years and much haven't really  changed. Relationships have been a roller coaster for me,I mean I've had the good,the bad and the was I drugged the entire time ??😆😅 But I can tell you that there have been two people I've been "in love" with who have somehow shook me to the core and made me 1.Question myself and 2.Question the notion of "Love" ever after.See,there was the story of unrequited love....the kinda love where I settled for someone that served no concrete purpose or planted roots in my life.I remember walking away and feeling totally lost as a result of "Loving the wrong person right".You know how they always say we love the ones who hurt us and hurt the ones who love us??Hmmmmmmmmm "They" didn't lie.....I think at that point in time,I lost my faith in LOVE....and that's when I found God.So you really have to hit rock bottom to be able to see the top.Finding a relationship with God in 2009 was exactly what I needed  to find myself again,to figure out who I was after I had done all these things I'd told myself I would never do!.After i's accepted things i never wanted!.See when you've actually crossed the lines you vowed you  never would ... I was absolutely lost...All in the quest to loved!.See,I've always had a fairytale notion when it comes to LOVE...Boy meets girl,Boy dates girl,Boy and girl  make babies and live happily ever after.In the real world that Idea I've carried with me was but a dream and so I thought maybe if I just stopped wanting ...stopped loving...maybe then I wouldn't be dissapointed but see what I learned is that if God is able to LOVE me unconditionally and if he has put that kind of LOVE in my heart then it means that he's also placed someone just like me who craves the same thing that I do and so......He sent me "LOVE ".....right when I was about to give up on my happily ever after he sent me a man that was able to love me.I mean not just like me for a few  months or stick around for a season but someone who loved just the way I did!And I believe that was his gift to me.....to remind me that I'm worthy of everything I expect!And that settling for less is never an option!.Now I've been loved thoroughly....And just like most things ,People come for a purpose and a reason and then they move on....So now being where I am today....I can look back and see the true value of real love!Now If something doesn't feel right...I get antsy.If I have to question someone's commitment .... I start retreating.What dishonor  it would be for me to settle for some half assed attempt at "Love" "Like" "Infatuation " after the bar has been set so high?? 💡 See,I've given chances to people who should have never gotten a second look and I've learned that even that  is okay because we all have a journey and so we all play a role In each other's lesson.So just like I've been taught to only accept that which my heart desires and maybe just maybe have a little faith in the LOVE I preach.....maybe I can teach someone how to ❤.
     Before you take my word for it.....Disclaimer:I do not know it all....and some days I forget all that I've learned and settle for a moment but my heart won't allow the betrayal and so I knock myself up the head when need be so I don't fall too far into the bootleg kinda love that people give so freely.At the end of the day as I always say LOVE!It's better to take the risk than spend your life wondering what if..........
   I hope I make sense to someone...or at least I hope I've given you enough of a peek into my heart.Be Blessed!Be a Blessing! LOVE! 😙

🎄Happy Holidays to you and yours! 🎄

The Lesson of Love: Part 1

Ok so on my mind this morning is a discussion I've had with myself and with others.In this first part I want to take a minute to delve into "Self Love" and as the week goes by I'll come back and talk with you about the other types of Love relationships we seek........
     Now I have to start from the root before I can get to the top.As a young woman I remember feeling unsure and uncomfortable  in my own skin,growing up I was a skinny black girl with no booty (Still ain't got much booty 😆).And we all know that black women  are "Supposed" to have a big Ole but in order to be "attractive " or "sexy" or "Black"😅.......See between the ages of 16-25 I went through many phases of insecurity about my body and my self worth and as a result of a lack in confidence in both I made some choices that perhaps had I been more grounded in "Self" I would not have made.See,what I've learned as a result is to know who I am and what I will or will not stand for and to be confident that the person I am is deserving of everything I can imagine  to be.But,when you are low on "Self".....you gravitate towards anything and anyone who shows you even for a minute anything else....and I believe it goes back to childhood,as does everything  else.As a young girl growing up,I wasn't  told I was beautiful, I wasn't  told I was loved,I didn't see any positive kind of loving relationship  that I could have taken from and mirrored in my own journey.Instead I got lost in books and my own personal view of what love looks like to me.What I saw is the type of attention  one got for looking a certain way.....now don't get me wrong if you asked me how I felt about myself I would say I was the Ish!.However I guess like every young girl at that age,the insecurities would come to visit and sometimes move in for a while.We live in a generation that is built on a certain look and a certain type of lifestyle and really no foundation that teaches our young girls how to value themselves and the majority of us are coming from a household that is lacking in that department.
    I'm not ashamed to say that once upon a time I was that young girl who settled for and did things because I didn't truly love or value myself....I mean I didn't hate myself but if you understand where I'm coming from then you know that when you grow up in a home without a father or any type of positive image of how you are to be treated as a woman by a man....You have to figure that out for yourself!.And,for some that means that we will go out looking for the kind of love that we didn't get to experience as a child in all the wrong places,from all the wrong types of men and as a result end up way more F-d up than when you started coz see,when you give of yourself,Your love,Your Body,Your spirit....it literally drains you some and you're left with a little less than you started with and remember  you didn't start with much in the beginning so if you don't take the time to actually build up yourself from the inside out and you keep giving  of Yourself to someone that does not feed you with what you truly need but simply robs you of your essence then you are left Empty!Then the cycle repeats itself because see,you were never supposed to be looking for that from someone else what is already inside of you!Do u hear me though??I believe our father created us with enough but as parents we are to help our child to concrete that type of love by showing us exactly what it looks like and then as young women we will be more grounded in our "Self" to know what is right and what is not okay to accept!.And the same goes for our young men......It's a sick cycle that has no end until we all individually come to that place of reflection and actually  want more of what we were born to have.Self worth,Self value,Self confidence......Self Love!.Because before you can even give true love to another human ,you have to first be grounded in who you are and in turn that person must be at that place as well.So I beg you....young woman,young man,grown folks who have little hearts to nurture to try to focus less on making sure your child has all the best brand names and instead  Focus on feeding their hearts and their minds and their spirits so in  turn they will feed every person they meet with "Love Unconditional " .Let's end the cycle of young girls looking for love from young boys who don't know what love looks like who then turns into grown folks raising children with no foundation to stand on and then it starts all over again..........😕.
   This was a bit heavy I know but I've always spoken LOVE  above all else because I truly believe the key to every issue is to Love first and everything else comes secondary.So why not start from the root.......water the core,prune it,weed it out so that when it breaks ground......you're  prepared to grow and feed others.That's all for now.Be Blessed!Be a Blessing!LOVE! 😙

Reflections

Hey blog world!......

I'm coming at you live and direct from Mee Mee Ville. ...How are ya'll  doing?It's been a long 2 weeks for me,Although outside of work I feel like I have absolutely no kinda life whatsoever  😕 BUT it's all good!After being away for 2 years in sunshine n coconut trees and miles upon miles of ocean ,it's good to be back In the land of ice and snow.😅I feel that I definitely  needed to go back to St Vincent to become a real vincy 🙈.....The way I look at life is that for every season,every opportunity  that comes..... it's meant to happen and in the process we may not even know why it did but  trust that you'll be able to look back on it and see the process and the purpose behind every little thing that you go through.Thats God! Always teaching.So the question  is how open are we to learning?  Sometimes I see myself running around the same mountain  over and over again simply because i refuse to accept the lesson and grow from it BUT when I finally make the climb and look down on the journey. .....once again That's  God!I think the biggest realization  I've had is that life itself is like an obstacle  course...there will be hurdles, you will have to jump,roll and skip and climb...it's not meant to break you but to build you into the very best version of yourself. SO my fellow champions. ....Never allow yourself to give in!Coz the prize is right around the corner. Now back to work I go.Be Blessed!Be a Blessing! LOVE! 😙